boobs?

I've got opinions here, but I'm not sure they're very well thought out, so I'm hoping that writing them down will bring them to some form of cohesion.

Through some discussion with Adam last night, I worked out that I'm *not* a feminist. I don't think I even want equality for the sexes in all areas because I don't think it's possible. I *like* gender roles in a lot of cases. What I want is gender *balance*. That both parties get rewarded and appreciated for the work that they do, no matter how different, and that both parties are respected. So that means that I'd like equal pay for women, but I'm quite happy to cook and clean as long as Adam also works hard and that he appreciates that I'm doing work too.

What I don't like is women being objectified, and women trying to validate themselves, to find self worth, in the eyes of men.

I think that women who are constantly trying to be more sexually attractive for me are just playing into their hands, making them more powerful, and can get downright stupid. I got called out for misogyny for calling some women stupid, and I got called a women-hater.

I got completely PWNED in a discussion in asian_beauty where I reposted an article kyuuketsukirui found, where mothers were now taking their prepubescent children to the spa for facials and bikini waxes. I thought those women were stupid. It was a sensationalist article, but I can't see the point of giving a 14 year old girl microdermabrasion to give her younger looking skin, nor giving a girl with no pubic hair a bikini wax.

Girls at asian_beauty did not think so. Apparently some girls at age 12 or so have bad acne and need facials. Apparently, some hate all body hair. I don't know where they *learnt* to hate their body hair, or how a mother could think of taking an 8 year old for a bikini wax. Who is going to look at a girl's bikini line? It's feeding into male power.

And now with theferret's Open Source Boob Project. At first, I was hardly upset. As far as I could tell, if a guy came up to you and asked to touch your boob, you could just say no. Big deal. How is that different to regular western society?

I have phenomonal boobs. :) They are big yet shapely and perky and firm and supple and all the rest of it. Best looking part of my body by far. I'm not a sexual shrinking violet, and have had tons of requests to 'touch my boobs'. # of people that have touched my boobs can be counted on one hand. It's not hard to say no if you don't want someone touching you. I also can see that some women don't think boobs are that big a deal, and thus Adam has Boob Touching Amnesty, by which if any girl ever offers him her boobs to be touched, he's allowed to touch them and I won't care. Just a couple of lumps of fat on a chest, guys.

That actually led to a couple of girl friends I have at the uni cafeteria just going up to him and saying 'you can touch mine'. Apparently it's not a big deal for some girls. Either that or they have the hots for my fiance.

Still, Adam felt the need to tell me that my boobs were better, every single time. Honey, I know. :p And I don't care, because *I* like my boobs.

What got me really upset was this paragraph.

By the end of the evening, women were coming up to us. "My breasts," they asked shyly, having heard about the project. "Are they... are they good enough to be touched?" And lo, we showed them how beautiful their bodies were without turning it into something tawdry.

UGH. WHY ARE SOME GIRLS SO STUPID. In a total 'get off my side you make my side look stupid' kind of way. I don't care if it makes me misogynist. Why must some girls ask for validation? Why are they playing into their hands, just to feel some self worth? WHY DO THEY LET THEMSELVES BE OBJECTIFIED? For some reason, some girls took a giant big game of 'YAY BOOBIES FOR EVERYONE' and made it 'OH NO MY BOOBIES AREN'T GOOD ENOUGH'

Why are girls never good enough?

wedding first dance songs

I've been racking my brain for months and I can't think of a song I can dance to at the wedding.

We have 'our song', but it's not a song you can particularly dance to, and will be used for something else.

I asked Adam if he had any opinions, because he has so few pertaining to the wedding, and all he said was,

a) it can't be sung by a female
b) it can't be 'gay'.

After asking what that totally un-PC word meant and giving him the lecture, I think means that I can't dance to the Darren Hayes Love Song Medley I've always wanted. (I'm only half joking.)

It might also mean that I can't dance to 80s power ballads like Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You or anything by Peter Cetera.

And that I can't dance to insincere limp R&B ballads. Sorry KC & JoJo.

Which leaves Indie/Alternative music, right?

I can't think of anything appropriate. I mean, I can, but they all got crossed off the list for some reason.

I need your help! What are your favourite romantic songs that I can dance to?

I'll stick a list of songs I've thought about under the cut.

( Read more... )