Jun. 27th, 2012

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Sometimes you forget that even though you're checking your FL every day, doesn't mean you're posting! We've been really sick here, and Adam's entire family have been really sick, so I've been running around looking after people when I haven't been vomiting.

I was thinking the other day as I was watching Liam in the shopping centre playground that I was really proud of him. I was proud to have him as my son, and not for any specific reason - he's not advanced in any way, he's okay looking but average sized, just a really normal kid, if not a bit shy. But I'm so proud of *everything* he does, and everything he learns.

I told Adam about it, and he was all, 'well of course, you're his mum, of course you're proud of him!'

But I don't know, I'm positive my parents aren't proud of me, and even less so of my brother, and there isn't anything wrong with my brother. I'm frickin proud of him. My parents have never given any indication that they're proud of me, and I even got another 'your life is such a disappointment to me' speech from my mum on the weekend because my friend Hieu is getting married and 'anyone would be proud to have her as a daughter, you knew you did a good job bringing her up then' (and you know, it didn't even upset me, because my mum was being ridiculous - Hieu's mum has spent Hieu's entire life living through her and now she's getting married and moving out and Hieu's mum has nothing. She barely talks to her husband, doesn't have any friends and Hieu is feeling guilty about 'abandoning' her mum. My mum thinks Hieu's mum will still feel inner satisfaction that Hieu turned out so well, but what, is Hieu's mum just supposed to like, fade away now? My mum has a wonderful marriage and tons of friends. My mum still feels sorry for herself though, lol)

Anyway, do you think the pride thing is something that all mums feel regardless, and my mum just probably isn't showing it? I was quite astonished at how I feel about Liam.

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wickedcherub

January 2013

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